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By John Carter Reprinted from The Christadelphian, 1949-1950
Some Practical Considerations PAGE 90 WE have considered a number of matters all bearing on the question of marriage -- matters none of which were free from difficulty, but which are so related to the subject that without considering them it would have been impossible to deal with practical questions both individual and ecclesial. PAGE 91 Marriage, then, has its fundamental principles rooted in the creative purpose. One woman was made for the one man and they two became one by marriage as they were one in creation before the woman was made. But the method of creation indicated that it was intended that marriage should fulfil social and spiritual purposes besides those aspects of life common to beast and bird. Therefore, the original creation is a type of the new creation which consists of a second Adam and his bride. The revelation concerning the Lord and his bride should be allowed to illustrate the relationships of husbands and wives, as is set forth beautifully and profoundly by Paul in Eph. 5:22-33. By a question on the subject of divorce, much disputed through differing interpretations of Deut. 24:1-4, the Pharisees thought they could entangle Jesus -- whatever answer he gave to their question would offend someone. They seemed incapable of learning that their best efforts failed to ensnare him, for while their guile was met with the skill of a clear thinking teacher sent of God, their sophistries were exposed by a statement of principles. The fundamentals of the matter, he said, were to be found in the words of Genesis, which were God's declared will for men. He that made man said: "For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh." On this Jesus made the comment: "Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." By God's arrangement a man and woman who accepted each other in marriage were man and wife for life, and man should not by his laws sunder that union. The Lord's answer is a firm endorsement of God's revealed purpose, and all the Lord's PAGE 92 disciples should uphold his declaration as the divine standard. PAGE 93 marriage has been the upholding of the rule that a marriage must be "only in the Lord". Among English speaking brethren abroad other problems have arisen through the facilities for divorce provided in the civil laws under which they live. In the last forty years, however, great social changes have taken place in Britain. Two world wars have loosened moral standards, while at the same time interest in the Bible has so far declined that the majority of people know nothing or next to nothing of its contents. In 1937 the Matrimonial Causes Act laid down new conditions for divorce, including desertion for a period of three years. The promoters of this new legislation had in mind relief for what were regarded as hard cases, and probably did not realize that the floodgates were being opened for a spate of appeals reaching about 50,000 a year. At the present rate (written in 1950) the number of divorces increases yearly by about 100,000. In many cases re-marriage at once is contemplated, and in the majority of cases re-marriage at some time might be expected. Clearly a new social environment is in the making in a land which two generations ago was marked by strict conventions. PAGE 94 ignorant of the character of marriage as revealed in Scripture. The strong leavening of evolutionary thought, imbibed from school days, fosters a view of marriage in which biology rather than religion dominates the thought. From the start such marriages are regarded as terminable by recourse to the divorce courts -- a process now so common that little stigma is felt to attach to it. In fact, in many ways some modern marriages are little different from pagan marriages of the first century, and many of the converts in Paul's ecclesias before they knew the Gospel had much in common with the modern pagan. It is clear that in these cases the clock cannot be put in reverse; to seek to do so would create endless problems. But there are some things that must be done. The Scripture teaching on this subject should be plainly set forth; conviction of an error, even one made in ignorance, leading to confession, is necessary to forgiveness for shortcomings. Assent to the divine principles on marriage in the case of a divorced or divorced remarried person is essential before baptism. PAGE 95 and the partner may have formed a further alliance without a marriage ceremony. Here the "exceptive clause" would appear to apply. But even in such cases caution may be necessary, as another illustration shows. A brother or sister may be unfaithful to their partner and the behaviour of the erring one pains and shocks the ecclesia. The offended partner may adopt an air of injured innocence and claim the right to divorce. It may be, however, that the "innocent" one is largely responsible for the other's lapse; persistent cruelty, or the continual wearing of a critical tongue, may have built up a repressed resentment that at last has burst the bonds of convention to the surprise of all friends and acquaintances. While no justification can be advanced for an open wrongdoer, a divorce under such circumstances can present an ecclesia with the problem of dealing with two erring people: and who can assess which may have sinned most in the eyes of the Almighty? The best an ecclesia can do is to judge every case patiently and carefully on its merits. PAGE 96 Paul, and above all, of the Lord Jesus. It is important also to remember the teaching of the Lord in his reference to eunuchs. When the disciples expressed their surprise as Jesus so uncompromisingly laid down God's rule for the sanctity of marriage, and said that if that were so, "it is good not to marry", Jesus replied that some were eunuchs for the Kingdom of heaven's sake. In its immediate context Jesus was recognizing that a celibate life might be deliberately chosen for the sake of the Kingdom. At the same time he recognized that all could not receive the saying. But we do not violate the spirit of his teaching by giving the saying a larger context. Like several of his declarations there are many applications: and one application would be to the case of a brother or sister who finds it necessary to secure full separation from an unchaste partner -- when the path chosen voluntarily by the eunuchs for Christ's sake may be the best choice. Even so, it must not be forgotten that Jesus added, "he that is able to receive it, let him receive it". He recognized human weakness and was sometimes kinder and more understanding than his followers to fellow mortals. PAGE 97 remembered, however, that in these cases two, and possibly three people are involved. Full reparation may be impossible to the one who is sinned against; a new marriage may have been entered into; a further divorce would add sin to sin; and we might ponder the fact that God forbade a return to a former husband of a divorced wife (Deut. 24:4). The real difficulty felt by brethren who call for this stern attitude to fellowship arises from the view that such a marriage is not really marriage but an illicit union -- that there exists "a state of adultery" (a vague phrase which can cloud thought). But in the examination of Christ's teaching we saw reason to conclude that he recognized the new union as marriage, but regarded those who entered into it as comparable to persons who cherish lustful thoughts and who, in the view of Jesus, thereby commit adultery. That it is a marriage which contravenes the Lord's teaching is fully evident, and this should not be disguised: but so also is a marriage "not in the Lord". Therefore, in both cases it is requisite that the sin of entering into such a marriage should be recognized and repented of; and when the true teaching of Scripture is devoutly acknowledged, we can conceive it possible that some who recognize the grievousness of their error may feel that for them the saying about eunuchs applies and for them indicates the only possible course; but it is not in the power of any to impose this. Others finding themselves in a position where there are difficulties in whatever course of action they may take, may endure the torture of conscience that comes with the feeling that wrongdoing has put them in a position where to do right altogether has become impossible. Such a situation is one of the products of sin -- the tragedy that the sinner is so enmeshed in the consequences of his sin that there is no way open entirely free from further wrong. Thus a man who PAGE 98 has divorced his wife for desertion and married another, has wronged the first wife, and any attempt to rectify it can only be by doing a further wrong, this time to the second wife. |
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